A review of every soapy massage parlor in Pattaya

Pattaya is world famous for naughty nightlife and adult fun. What’s more fun than a soapy massage parlor? Well, not much. It’s like the adult version of going down a water slide. Except there’s a hot naked chick with her legs spread at the bottom waiting for you to arrive. Well not exactly. But you get the idea.

In case you are unaware, a soapy massage parlor is more or less what it sounds like. At a bare minimum customers get washed and massaged. In the old school places the chicks also get totally naked, cover their bodies with soapy suds, and slide up and down on the customers. While it’s not going to show up in any travel brochures more or less every chick in a soapy massage parlor will also blow and bang their customers. And that’s really all there is to it.

Now each soapy has its own uniqueness. Some of these shops are set up for the wham-bam-thank-you-mam kind of service. Especially in a tourist town like Pattaya. That doesn’t mean they are ripping anybody off though. They pretty much do what they say they will, even if some guys don’t find that satisfactory. Now I never look a gift horse in the mouth. But I can recognize that some places are better than others even if they all are pretty damn good considering.

In these days of enhanced hygiene it’s always nice to know there are places you can go and get a full body wash by a taut Thai woman. Nothing cleans the back of your legs like a nicely manicured Thai muff! So that’s why I have decided to review every soapy massage parlor in Pattaya.

Sabai Dee

Sabai Dee is one of the most major soapy massage parlors in Pattaya. This place wouldn’t even be out of place in Bangkok. It’s got a big colorful exterior that shines bright right on Second Road. All the tourists have to pass it on their way to the malls or the beach. But just in case they have signs outside in many languages that welcome men, women and probably even other species. The place is huge with a bigger lobby than most hotels in the city. There are close to a hundred chicks on a good day. Most are in their 30’s or thereabouts. They’re all pros with prom dresses and lots of makeup. They can all do great body body soapy slides too. Just don’t expect anything in the way of intimacy. Not that you should in a place like this! The rooms are huge but not all that well maintained. But the VIP quarters are still nice.

• Number of women: 70+
• Environment: Bright
• Attractiveness of women: Average
• Skill level: Good
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/P9xXpk5ndwpjQxbC8

Sabai Room

Sabai Room is another big soapy massage parlor in Pattaya. I can’t be sure but it seems like it’s also one of the oldest. They do their upkeep though so it’s still in good condition. Sabai Room is easy to find on Second Road. It’s also about as straight forward as it gets. The bad thing is that they don’t have as many chicks as most other soapies. And the chicks tend to be older and sometimes even on the chubby side. But on the other hand these are real soapy massage pros. So the service at Sabai Room always comes with an actual soapy body to body slide on the inflatable mat. You know, just like a real Japanese soapland.

• Number of women: 5-12
• Environment: Standard
• Attractiveness of women: Low
• Skill level: Very high
• Price: 2500 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/xMfc6vvGm8vXDcTn7

Honey

Honey Body Massage is another big and well known soapy in Pattaya. In fact this place is so well known that everyone calls the street this place is on “Soi Honey.” How’s that for notoriety? People also call this place “Honey 1” because there are two more Honey massages in Pattaya. This is the original. It’s pretty straight forward if mechanical. Lots of chicks inside. They charge 2000, 2500 or 3000 Baht depending on the color of their badge. The rooms are very nice and big but at this point a little dated. Service is standard. Mutual bathing following by a condom BJ and boom boom. Ninety minutes on the dot, but they try to get you out the door sooner. There are some really hot chicks with rocking bodies here. But their hearts can be darker than midnight in the Congo. One chick told me she does 6 guys a day then goes home.

• Number of women: 70+
• Environment: Nice
• Attractiveness of women: Good
• Skill level: Average
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/HBS4dQXncBpKpqcA8

Honey 2

This is another Honey massage location. It’s a little new than the first but you really can’t tell. I am not sure why but Chinese and Indian guys really seem to love this place. It must be on some kind of tourist trails or maps or something. Lots of women. One evening I counted over a hundred. Usually there are less than that. Though a good amount are up in the 50 plus rooms taking care of business. This place is assembly line style. She takes you to the room, strips you, washes you, sucks you and screws you. Then you’re headed back down the elevator wondering where the time went and she’s on to the next John.

• Number of women: 70+
• Environment: Nice
• Attractiveness of women: Good
• Skill level: Average
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/u5WYS1nx3Jma4Zfr7

Honey 3 aka Grand Honey

More of the same, but arguably a little bigger and better than the others. At least in terms of the building itself. As you might have guessed by the little number at the end of the name, this is the third Honey soapy massage in Pattaya. It is also the newest. This place opened at the end of 2019. So it didn’t get much of a run before everything was shut down. I don’t know if Honey 3 will ever take off and reach the level of success found at the first place. But I will stop in again if I am in the area if only to see how the chicks are looking when I get there.

• Number of women: 40+
• Environment: New
• Attractiveness of women: Average-Good
• Skill level: Average
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/YkWATvE76Xt8PnF5A

PP Massage

PP Massage is probably the most popular of these places even though it has an out of the way location. Why? Because bus loads of Chinese and Indian tourists pull in here all the time. In my opinion PP Massage is also the worst of all the soapies in Pattaya. What else would you expect though? The chicks literally have their way through entire bus loads of guys one cock at a time. It doesn’t leave much for the regular guy who just wanders in. One time I stopped in right after 3 big tour buses pulled out of the parking lot. I only saw 5 chicks behind the glass. And one of them was asleep! The chicks here wear two color badges. The older chicks get red badges and charge 2000 Baht. The 20 to 30 year old chicks with better bodies wear blue badges and charge 3000 Baht.

• Number of women: 30+
• Environment: Plain
• Attractiveness of women: Low-Average
• Skill level: Low-Average
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/WD8Pa55Weeg7oiCYA

Rasputin

If PP massage is the worst soapie in Pattaya then Rasputin is the best. This place also has a kind of out of the way location. But Rasputin is more convenient to reach as you can easily walk there. It’s at the end of a parking lot near Soi 6. The building is nice and big. The floor managers are cordial. They have a huge show room with at least fifty chicks waiting for customers. And the rooms upstairs look like they belong in 5 star hotels. Now none of the chicks here are really good at the soapy body to body massage. In fact a lot of them don’t even do it at all. But they have some of the hottest and nicest chicks of any soapie and I’ve had some incredible action here. These days it’s one of the only soapies in Pattaya I consider a “must visit.” Rumor has it that this place has Russian chicks working inside. But I don’t think that’s true. I’ve been inside many times and asked around a lot too. No Ruskies. But I did see a lot of Arab customers for whatever that is worth.

• Number of women: 50+
• Environment: Palatial
• Attractiveness of women: Average-Good
• Skill level: Average
• Price: 2000-3000 Baht
• Location: https://goo.gl/maps/eqagtfjDin8UxxsG9