Bangkok soapy massage parlors are some of the biggest brothels in the entire world. The go go bars of Bangkok might be more numerous or well known to the average guy. But the big soapy massage parlors are more major. Even a lot of rich Thai guys go the soapy massage parlors, while the go go bars are mostly just tourist traps for foreigners.
If you keep your eyes open you can see soapy massage parlors all over Bangkok. They even label them in English! A lot of them are as big as hotels with elaborate names and decoration. On the drive between the airport and the Sukhumvit area alone you even pass a few of these places. Even see that big sign for “Office” on Rama IX Road from the back of your airport taxi? Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret. That’s not a place where people go to crunch numbers.
What is a soapy massage?
Soapy massage parlors are also known as soaps, soapies, and soaplands. The name basically explains it all. Or at least it explains what they are technically supposed to be all about. Since shops can’t put up a sign that says “this is a brothel” they come up with different ways of working. One is to offer a soapy or shower massage for money. Then they just say whatever the chicks do after the massage is up to them. This makes soapy massage a “legitimate business.” That’s why when Bangkok was coming out of lock down the government actually added “soapy massage” to the list of businesses permitted to reopen.
A shower massage is just another way of saying that a chick washes your body with her hands. Some women do this better than others. Normally they get naked and put you in a bathtub. They wash your body a bit, especially focusing on your dick and ass to make sure you’re fresh and clean. They might also offer to wash your hair. Then they dry you with a towel and send you a bed. A good soapy massage masseuse will also get in the bath with you and suck your dick a bit. The worse ones just hose you off like a dirty dog, or worse, tell you to shower alone. That’s pretty rare though.
So officially you pay for a shower massage at these places. It’s like a South Korean ANMA or Japanese soapland in that way. In reality the chicks at Bangkok soapy massage parlors suck and fuck their customers without fail. They might forget the massage but they never forget the full service.
I did once hear a story about a white guy who was only offered a handjob after the massage girl saw his huge dick. But apparently he was able to switch providers, so in the end there was no problem even for him. That was also in Pattaya. The soapy massage parlors in Pattaya are meant for tourists, so they are about the worst you can find in the country. The Pattaya soapies don’t compare to the soapies in Bangkok.
How it works
For people who have been to a soapy massage it may seem to stupid to explain “how it works.” But we’ve all been new at some point in life. No one is born knowing everything there is to know. So I will break down how Bangkok soapies run, even though it is all really easy and basically self explanatory.
Soapy massage parlors typically have big open doors like a hotel. You walk in and you may or may not see a front counter. That’s for paying, so there’s no need to stop there. Instead you go inside and find a huge area that looks like a restaurant with lots of seats. All the seats will be pointing at an area where the women sit. Sometimes they sit on chairs. Other times they sit on stairs. In a lot of places this area is behind glass, so some people call it a “fishbowl.”
The chicks in the soapies tend to be taller, lighter and bustier than the average Thai chick. That’s not always the case, but as a general rule it is true. Keep in mind that these places cater to Thai and Asian guys for the most part. So the looks of the women match up with that.
Anyway, the women behind the glass normally have numbers pinned to their clothes. Different colors and shapes indicate different prices. There’s usually a manager walking around who can explain all the prices. Some are better than others and know details about the chicks like whether or not they have fake tits. Others can barely speak English and very obviously don’t give a shit.
You can order a drink in this waiting area, but you don’t have to. You can pick a chick from the seating area too. Again, you don’t have to. Some places will have “models” sitting in a special area. Others have actual models from magazines and television, but they usually get booked by appointment. Most guys stick with the chicks on the regular seats. They give a number for one of the chicks to the manager. Then the go pay the front counter. Then the chick comes out and escorts them into a private room with a bath and bed. In the room they wash, suck and fuck. Normally in that order. There’s really nothing else to it.
Soapy massage in Bangkok
There are more soapy massage parlors in Bangkok than I can count. They are spread all over town, sometimes into areas you would never expect. Sadly, a few of the biggest and best soapy massages in Bangkok have even closed in recent years. But there are still more than enough around to get you wet. Some of them are really good too. Here’s a list of the best Bangkok soapy massage parlors. You’ll notice that many are near the Huay Kwang MRT Station.
I admit that is not a complete list of every single soapy massage parlor in Bangkok. But it is a pretty good overview of what exactly is available. For the most part the women in all of these places will go with a customer no matter where he comes from. Sometimes a place will add a foreigner tax on white guys or non-Thai brown guys. There might even be a masseuse who refuses a guy. I have never personally seen it but it could definitely happen. This is after all the land of smiles, which doesn’t always mean what you think.
Still, it is nice to have a wide variety of soapy massage parlors available. It is this kind of thing that keeps guys pouring into Thailand by the million. Every country in Southeast Asia have temples and elephants. But only Thailand has soapy massage parlors on the side of the highway where you can pull in and get off.