I travel Bangkok on foot

Bangkok is a major city with a big public transportation network. There are taxis, tuk tuks, motorbike taxis, the MRT, the BTS, buses, trains, bicycle sharing, and ride share apps. But guess what? Ninety nine percent of the time I travel Bangkok by foot.

Getting around Bangkok is a major pain in the ass otherwise. Sure it’s not as bad as Manila or Jakarta. One reason I don’t write about those two cities much is that I mostly avoid them. The grind of doing something as basic as crossing the road in those two urban cesspools is enough to keep me away. Even though there is tons of good and easily available pussy in each.

Bangkok is more open and easy to get around. At least in comparison to some other Asian metropolises. Sure it is no Berlin or Tokyo. But you can actually navigate most of the city with your own two feet.

Centralized near Central

I have been to Bangkok more times than I can count. Sometimes I stay for a few days while in transit to some other destination. But I’ve stayed as long as a year straight. That year was probably a little too long though. Everyone needs a break eventually.

When I am in Bangkok I rarely stay anywhere other than lower Sukhumvit. Usually somewhere between Central Embassy and Terminal 21. And never more than a 5 minute walk from Sukhumvit Road.

walking to beat bangkok traffic

If you get deeper down the side sois you can find much cheaper hotels and apartments. But then you have a sweaty walk just to get to Sukhumvit. Or you risk your life by riding on the back of one of those fucked up mini bikes driven by even more fucked up dudes in orange vests.

I don’t want to die with a cracked skull on the Bangkok pavement like so many other suckers before me. So I station close to Sukhumvit and travel on my own two feet. That way when a truck comes barreling at me in the wrong direction I at least have a chance to jump out of the way.

My usual Bangkok plan

When I stay in the said area I am in immediate walking distance of all the best parts of Bangkok. I can walk to any Bangkok BJ bar, most oily massage parlors, Nana Plaza, Soi Cowboy, and if the weather is right even Patpong.

Now the walk from Nana to Patpong is about forty five minutes long, so you don’t want to take that stroll if it’s hot, humid, or rainy. Which is to say most of the normal weather conditions in Bangkok. But I have done it quite a few times on cooler dryer evenings. It saved me from getting jammed in with lots of unwashed dudes with sweaty armpits on the BTS. Or arguing with taxi drivers who say the trip is 300 Baht when in reality it is more like 50 if they would use the meter.

Of course 250 Baht isn’t a big deal. Neither is the 10 or 20 you spend on the BTS. It’s more a matter of dignity for me. Maybe it’s my latent Americanism but I don’t like to be bossed around or herded like cattle. It just sticks in my craw. Especially if I have to deal with cheating cab drivers or stinky mother fuckers who don’t clean their bodies before jamming into a train like sardines in a can.

Not to mention that walking can actually be the faster way to get around Bangkok. The BTS and MRT can get so crowded at times that you have to wait thirty minutes just to get on board. Then you’re lucky if you will even fit in the fucking train. Not to mention that most of those elevated stations require you to walk up 3 flights of stairs to even get to the train. Then 3 more flights down to leave at the exit. If you’re already walking that much why not just walk the whole way?

Cars are no better. Ever see the traffic on Sukhumvit in the evening? It can take 30 minutes for a taxi to get through Asoke intersection at times. Forget about it if you’re on the wrong side of the road. Then your taxi has to go up several blocks just to turn around. Meanwhile you can walk from Nana to Soi Cowboy in a matter of minutes.

One of the reasons I stay fit even now is that I take care of my body. I eat healthy and walk whenever I can. I don’t overdo it on stuff like booze and I stay away from addicts and the poisons they ingest.

This leaves me with time, money and energy to indulge in the best stuff on earth: pussy holes and mouths! There’s plenty of both in Bangkok and most is easy to reach on foot.

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